"And I Don't Work For Nobody But You..."

So, it's Friday afternoon as I type this (I may hold the post for awhile so bear with me) and I wanted to relate a little tale about a guy who's in my blogroll. You've probably never heard of him before this, but you will. (Yeah I know. "Cryptic Boy" again)
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Many months ago I received comments from this guy thanking me for this or that bit of information that I spewed out into the scribosphere. Apparently, I was of some service to him. He had shot his first film, and he was in the process of editing, and long-story-short, something I said made sense (Call Ripley), and he was able to cut down his film from 120 minutes to around 100.
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I kept track of what he was doing, because the story he told on his blog was a good concept. I thought, "At least he started off on the right foot. Let's see what he does with it."
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Well, he kept at it and kept at it, until one day - completely out of the blue - he emails me and says he wants to send me a screener of his movie. Now for the most part, first time moviemakers create crappy movies, and I was thinking that I would rather rip my eyeballs out through my sphincter than watch it, but I said, "okay," and he sent me the movie.
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It sat on my desk for awhile (what a wonderfully nebulous word that can mean a few minutes, days, weeks or even months) until I decided to pop it in and see the horror for myself.
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Then the movie started... and surprise, surprise I wasn't feeling the need to do an anal-corneal removal. The opening credits looked good, professional even. I picked up the DVD case and held it in my hand while I watched the movie all the way through - without fast forwarding a bit.

You know the old saying, "I want a movie that speaks to me?" Not only was this one speaking to me, this one was whispering in my ear and going for my boys...
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When it was over, I stopped the DVD player and sat in the dark, thinking about it. It wasn't a great movie, but it was damn good. Entertaining, first and foremost. (Hi, Denis!) Not embarassing at all. I could see myself working with this guy- maybe.
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So I called him up and left a message:
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"Hi! It's Bill Cunningham and I just saw your movie, and I'd like to talk to you about it. Give me a call back if you could or send me an email. "
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He called back.
We talked.
Papers were exchanged. Promises made. Virgins sacrificed.
Now I'm representing his film, Sex Machine to distributors.

And Christopher Sharpe is the man.

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He took a killer concept and with little money, but a lot of creativity and ingenuity, made a movie we can sell. We've already received interest from several distributors. Enough interest that we'll have to hire a lawyer soon...

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So be on the lookout for it on your video store shelf. In the meantime, take a look at the website with all the trailers and doodads you kids like so much.

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(and does anyone know why Blogger is not allowing photos to post???)

Crafty is as Crafty Does (and boy does it!)

I've finally finished Alex Epstein's Crafty TV Writing. I say "finally" because this book is a treasure trove of ideas and rules and hints and suggestions, and it's easy to go back and forth amongst the chapters and apply it all to what you're doing. You read one kernel of wisdom and in light of that, turn to another chapter with a brand new understanding of other concepts.
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Alex does an excellent job of laying it all out for you giving you the plusses and minuses of working in the TV biz. The book has helped me solidify some of my ideas I've had for series (or mini-series) and showed me what was going to work and what wasn't - especially since I haven't worked in television (yet). Bottom line:

Every spec monkey who is writing a
tv spec for next year's staffing season or for the Disney Fellowship should own
and highlight this book!

I fully expect my copy to become dog-eared and fat from use, and that's a damn good thing. We need more books like this that eschew the philosophical and get to the practical. Actually Alex doesn't eschew the philosophy so much as show you how it's put into regular practice on TV shows.

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The one gripe I would have with the book is the fact that we didn't get to see the entire Charlie Jade script. I would have liked to do a side-by-side comparison of sorts between the beat-sheet and the script. So Alex, if you want to send me that script I'd appreciate it.

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Don't wait. Get it today and get crafty.

The Con Is On (Disc)!

If you wish to thrill to the misadventures of Mickey, Danny, "Albee", Stacie and Ash, then hustle yourself down to your local purveyor of fine video products, and pick up this set. This is one of the best television series ever - period! Witty and wonderful and an utter delight every time. Series 4 will be coming this fall, so this set will be a good primer for the uninitiated.

Happy 25th Birthday!

Me wishing Liz Fies aka Kid Sis in Hollywood a Happy Birthday! last Thursday at The Bigfoot Lodge.

Your Mad Pulp Bastard is on the right...

Bloody Fun Sunday

Had a great time at Screenplay Lab discussing how low budget DVD Premieres are made. In an experiment of sorts we ran a "meeting" where we came up with the Latino Comedy...

EL ZORRO LOCO !

I'm going to take this a bit further than normal and kind of show you what a good title can do in a meeting like that. Unfortunately we didn't get to fully explore this entire concept at the lab, but just using the title and what we know about the genre and the conventions of a Zorro film, I did a little brainstorming and further developed the idea and some scenes:

-- Our "crazy Zorro" is an escapee from a mental institution who thinks he's Zorro.

-- Zorro doesn't wear all black, but has other bright spanish colors to his outfit. How about a scene where he steals his "costume" off of clotheslines in the barrio?

-- He's got to have a love interest so why not a social worker who is also the center of the conflict - she wants to put up a community center amidst all the gangs.

-- Zorro has to get into a sword fight, but he doesn't have a sword - maybe a stick they use to pick up trash?

-- Can't have a horse but maybe a lowrider or a motorcycle... or maybe a hotdog cart on wheels?

-- He's got to uncover the conspiracy as to why the center can't open. Tie the local assemblyman to the gangs.

-- He needs a "Bernardo" - someone to advise him. Maybe another escapee from the institution?

-- At some point this fantasy life needs to come into conflict with reality. (the lowest point for our crazy hero).

-- slapstick comedy has to rule the fight scenes.

-- character and verbal comedy has to rule the dialogue.

Anyone else care to brainstorm?

Billy Wilder's Screenwriting Tips

Billy Wilder's Screenwriting Tips
(and if you don't know who he is, pick up a book or see a movie or two will ya!)

As told to Cameron Crowe:

1. The audience is fickle.
2. Grab 'em by the throat and never let 'em go.
3. Develop a clean line of action for your leading character.
4. Know where you’re going.
5. The more subtle and elegant you are in hiding your plot points, the better you are as a writer.
6. If you have a problem with the third act, the real problem is in the first act.
7. A tip from Lubitsch: Let the audience add up two plus two. They'll love you forever.
8. In doing voice-overs, be careful not to describe what the audience already sees. Add to what they’'e seeing.
9. The event that occurs at the second act curtain triggers the end of the movie.
10. The third act must build, build, build in tempo and action until the last event, and then -- that's it. Don’t hang around.

To read the entire article go here.

Saturday at the Matinee

In freefall today as I wrap up a few things that have been on my plate for too long. I hate having unfinished work on my desk and in my brain. I'm reading Alex Epstein's Book, Crafty TV Writing and will have a review next week. I'm also reading two other books for a variety of reasons. My talk/workshop for tomorrow at the Screenplay Lab should be a lot of fun and hopefully, illuminating to people who haven't been in "The room" to see how DVD decisions are made - at least on the independent level. Yes, it is as cutthroat as it sounds. I actually like it that way. My notes for that need typing up.

Then there's chores around the Secret Headquarters - cleaning up the lab, putting a new interociter into the robot, recalibrating the atomic ray gun, refilling the atomic pile on the Strato-Sled. One never knows when villainy will strike, and it pays to be prepared. After that it's fun with the good Doctor and Rose and plenty of sleep before tomorrow.

Next week I'll make a few announcements that should be of interest to pulpy-minded film folk.

Breaking News

From Variety.com

AARON SPELLING DIES AT 83

Aaron Spelling, one of television's most prolific and commercially successful independent producers, died Friday at his mansion in Los Angeles after suffering a stroke on June 18.
He was 83.

With an uncanny knack for programming for younger audiences, Spelling was responsible for some of the most successful TV series of all time, including "The Mod Squad," "Starsky and Hutch," "Charlie's Angels," "The Love Boat," "Fantasy Island," "Dynasty" and "Beverly Hills, 90210."

Like Fred Silverman, the executive he worked closely with at ABC, Spelling was revered by some for his natural ability to predict what the country wanted to see and criticized by others for appealing to the lowest common denominator. Like it or not, Spelling's primetime fantasies helped shape television programming for more than four decades.

Spelling's other hit series included "Melrose Place," "Burke's Law," "T.J. Hooker," "Matt Houston," "Hart to Hart" and "Hotel." He kept his hand in 21st-century TV with series including "7th Heaven" and "Summerland."

I can honestly say I've seen episodes from every one of Spelling's series. I was a huge fan of The Mod Squad when I was a kid and I grew up with his work. His energy, drive and innovation will be missed.

Your Mad Pulp Bastard Speaks!

From the Screenplay Lab website:

Join us this Sunday at ScreenplayLab to hear screenwriter and DVD marketing wizard Bill Cunningham discuss the process ofwriting, producing and marketing to the direct-to-dvd (D2DVD) market. Bill has helped create many low-budget horror films. See his blog at D2DVD.Blogspot.com.

Our workshop reading will be: "Nothing About Love Makes Sense" by Rebecca Lynne Thompson. In this romantic comedy, a gay businessman and an uptight religious girl become roommates after each suffers a break-up. Rebecca is a writer based in Indiana. We'll read the first act of her feature screenplay followed by moderated actor and audience suggestions.

Location: Raleigh Studios in Hollywood Time: Sunday, June 25, 2006 from 3pm to 6pm
Free with RSVP at our online form. Limited seating. See you there!

www.ScreenplayLab.com

So if you want to show up and workshop with me on how D2DVD movies are put together, then fill out the form and I'll see you there. We're going to break down a movie that we create together right there on site.

Network? We Don't Need No Stinkin' Network!

An unsold television pilot from the creators of Scrubs has found new life (maybe, maybe not) on YouTube.

Here's the story behind "Nobody's Watching."

And here's Part One of the Pilot:

Die, Carlucci! Die!

First, this.

Then, this.

And finally, this .

I take no prisoners...

If You Got Excited About The Last Post...

Then you are absolutely, positively going to double your pleasure with this one here.

Fuel for your Pulp Engine

Oh yes, oh yes, oh YES!

Paul Malmont puts it down here in his Amazon blog. I will be picking up his book today.

Chinatown Death Cloud Peril relates an adventure of the creators of the two guys below who just might be familiar to you.

Radar Men From The Moon: Chapter Ten

Just click on the pic to begin the latest chapter in Commando Cody's adventure to stop an invasion by the evil Retik - Master of the Moon!

Friday Bytes

Just some digital bits before I finally get to work:

-- Had a discussion this morning with Warren Ellis on his site here. He makes a valid point that we need to push the boundaries of the DVD Premiere - in other words we need to get out of the eighties. I and several others think the time is right for a D2DVD TV series, but what needs to push it forward is - a) great content, and b) a rock solid business plan. All it takes is for one to be a success and the market will open up.

But we have to get through a lot of gatekeepers before that happens. Find champions of our work who are forward thinkers. Probably someone completely outside the industry who can see the multiple applications and licensing of a brand.

-- Saw this:

Loved same. If you haven't seen Venture Bros. yet, get out of the range of my foot. Now is the time to get the DVD set and prepare to have your funnybones assaulted. Somebody read way to many Hardy Boys and Tom Swift adventures while watching Jonny Quest hopped up on peyote. We have much lovelove for Venture Bros. here at DISContent.

-- Work moves forward on the Gore-met script. As a producer its great to work with Jeff and Jonathan. We are three thirds of one brain on this one (something my ex-girlfriends have said about me as well). Id, Ego and Superego all working toward making a cool Godfather of Gore flick.

-- Haven't seen nor heard from Shawna. One assumes she's busy with her pilot script. She'll pop up, we'll have a beer and talk about it.

-- There is a new item in the sidebar that will help me when it comes post time - a poll. If you would please take the time to tell me what you like about the blog here, I would appreciate it. if you need to go into detail, then send me a comment or an email.

-- I'll post more Radar Men From The Moon later today.

What The *@%$!

From Cynopsis this morning (before my coffee)

The cost of saying *&$@!# or doing anything remotely similar, just went up by about a gazillion percent. Yesterday President Bush made it official -- the FCC now has the authority to levy fines of $325,000 per violation of the broadcast indecency rules. And how does the FCC define indecent? If "in context [it] depicts or describes sexual or excretory activities or organs in a patently offensive manner as measured by contemporary community standards for the broadcast medium." As far as indecent speech - it has be when the little ones are in bed, determined by the FCC as after 10p and before 6a.

(There goes my TV series idea: Boner & Colostomy: Hollywood Private Dicks)

Denis, you guys may have your problems up north, but we have our fair share down here in the Southland too. Like Commisions that operate in direct violation to our constitution. Let's take this one to court, guys!

That Denis McGrath...

is one helluva guy. He takes notice of something I do here at DISContent and gives it the royal run up the old flagpole for all to see and hear.

It's always nice when your colleagues see something of themselves in something you write. Denis (if you don't know already and you should) is writing a new series Across The River to Motor City for Canadian television that should premiere next year. What's interesting is the series is set in both Ontario and across the lake in Detroit, Michigan. Be sure to let us know when it airs Denis because I don't want to miss downl... er, watching it.

Thanks for the shout out to my "manifesto" and as things come up we'll all add to it.

The Gorey Details...

Can be found here! And here. Oh, and here.

We are also in the process of building a production blog here.

Look! Up On Your Computer Screen!

A CYNOPSIS MESSAGE FROM WARNER BROS. DOMESTIC CABLE DISTRIBUTION

In2TV LAUNCHES SUPERMAN CHANNEL

Starts Tomorrow, Including:

The A&E Special"Look, Up In The Sky! The Amazing Story of Superman""The Adventures of Superman""Lois and Clark: The New Adventures of Superman"Max Fleischer Superman Cartoons

Exclusively at www.aol.com/in2tv

Warner Bros. Domestic Cable Distribution…Redefining Television

The Pulp Screenwriting Philosophy

In addition to "Mad Pulp Bastard" (which no one has yet to challenge me for in the ring or back alley), I am going to add the title "Philosopher" to create a new legend, "Mad Pulp Bastard Philosopher." Here's why.

I just got back from the Moondance Film Festival over at Raleigh Studios where I watched a few films and panels, and I don't think people "get it." There are so many "filmmakers" out there who are trying to put out an important message that they lose sight of why they are making a film in the first place. That's not to say that you can't have a message in your movie, it's just that's not the primary reason to make a movie.

The primary reason to make a movie is to entertain people by telling a story using the medium of film.

I'm going to write down my little philosophy of movies - just so everyone knows where I'm coming from. I'll add to it occaisionally and repost it. This is going to come off as a bit of a rant.
I don't apologize.

1. Pulp screenwriters learn best by doing. That means writing - a lot. That means making mistakes, learning from them and moving on. The more movies you write and get made, the more you learn.

2. Simpler is better.

3. You write to sell. By that I mean you write something in order to get it produced. That means selling the concept, selling the story and selling the script. Before you write one word - ask yourself - Who is going to want to see this story and why? If you can't answer that question - don't write the script.

4. Good scripts come from good outlines, that come from fully developed concepts and ideas. If you don't have a good outline - don't write the script until you do. It's far easier to change something on a three page document than it is on a 90 pager.

5. Time = money. Don't waste it.

6. Don't try and justify your work - if it doesn't make sense it needs to be rewritten.

7. Don't ever apologize for your writing or qualify it somehow. "Oh, well it's just a B-Movie." First off, there are no B-movies anymore. Second, be proud of anything you have accomplished.

8. No matter what - Don't ever be boring.

9. First drafts are the forest; Rewrites are the trees.

10. Don't make a horror movie without the horror in it. It is a waste of time (see #5 above).

11. Another way to get better as a writer is to work with people who are better than you are. Cream rises to the top.

To be continued...

Radar Men From The Moon: Chapter Nine

Click on the picture and enjoy this new action-packed chapter!

Don't Forget...

Scarecrow and Scarecrow Slayer are premiering on the SciFi Channel Tonight (Thursday) at 7pm /6 central. Check local listings for the proper time in your area.

Just When You Thought This Blog Couldn't Get Any Pulpier (or Weirder), There's This...

From the twisted mind of "Mister Monsterpants" himself, James Felix McKenney, comes this little bit of robotic madness that has even Dr. Satan envious!

Click on the pic and run for your lives!

Radar Men From The Moon: Chapter 8

Click the picture to go to our next thrilling adventure!

1st Draft Race Prep!

Edit 2: Getting better. Engines starting up...

Edit: Wow. One comment and no responses. That's well, underwhelming...

It's almost time for the 14 Day Screenwriting Event!

Okay screenwriters, start your engines!

No, wait! Stop!

Have you gas in your tank? (besides plenty of Diet Coke and Reese's Peanut Butter Cups?)
I'm talking about your title and your logline and your outline. The stuff that fuels the hemi in your muscle car of a D2DVD script. Is that set? Tuned for racing?

If not, then your Mad Pulp Bastard Racing Team is here. (If Denis McGrath can talk about NASCAR, I can surely use a few racing metaphors). If you think you're having problems then please post your logline up here on the rack and we'll take a look under the hood. We're running a special on bad titles this week too.

The point is that when the checkered flag is dropped, I want you guys to rush to the finish line with the best vehicle possible. This is a group project and as a group we should help one another get across the finish line in time.

So, keep the comments short and sweet. Title and logline and any questions you need help with that involves screenwriting. If I can't answer it - I'm sure someone in the scribosphere can.

This will be going on until 7 am saturday morning when you folks will be off and running on your scripts.

Remember the only race worth running in is the human one.

Fangoria Weekend of Horrors

I will be attending the Fangoria Weekend of Horrors this weekend at the Burbank Airport Hilton. If anyone else is attending please let me know.

Con info can be found here.